Short chapters summarized at end with Powerful Affirmations.
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If I could do all this it would be wonderful and so I add Phillip Moffitt's phrase "as best I am able". Aug 21, Janet rated it really liked it Shelves: Jul 25, Sharon rated it it was amazing. Deep read with amazing affirmations! Aug 14, Julie rated it it was amazing. As always, David Richo helps me understand life and how to live it as best I can. Short chapters, perfect for starting one's day in contemplation and meditation.
Tessa rated it it was amazing Apr 13, Brad rated it it was amazing Apr 10, Donna rated it really liked it Feb 22, Brobob rated it really liked it Oct 07, Flo rated it really liked it Oct 29, Peggy rated it really liked it Jul 05, Cathleen Kaufman rated it it was amazing Feb 02, Karen Knoke rated it really liked it Nov 24, Lonnie rated it really liked it Apr 25, Jenn rated it it was amazing Jul 06, Sue Mahran rated it it was amazing Apr 27, Joshua Sweetwood rated it it was amazing Apr 10, Megan Hulatt whyte rated it really liked it May 27, Scott Caplan rated it liked it Nov 19, Susan Freeman rated it really liked it May 06, Indeed, the opposite of ego attitude is its remedy: When we come across with a grandiose ego-attitude it becomes hard for others to love us—though they may feel sorry for us.
When we show the best of our true nature, all-inclusive gentle love, we become lovable. Letting go of an egotistical attitude is thus how we love ourselves best, because by that letting go we open to the love of others, which is what we really want, what we always wanted. Learning to let go of egotism in favor of the egolessness that love requires of us means we will have to be on the alert since ego lurks in our attitudes and behaviors often unnoticed.
I am here to experience real love in my life. We are watching out for even the slightest slur against our greatness. Our style in this book is not to ridicule ego or put it down. Instead, it is to show compassion for our own ego and that of others.
We see how its posturings are futile attempts to protect its vulnerability. We understand that a blustering ego is in pain.
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We empathize with the need behind the defenses. Our compassion for egotism is a recognition of a desperate and mistaken clinging to defenses for protection when defenselessness is actually what works best. As we trust ourselves more, we begin letting go of our defenses. Then our vulnerability no longer feels dangerous. It has become openheartedness. Now we trust the universe completely. It is an orientation of thinking and acting that is based on faulty beliefs about ourselves: The fact that an egotistical style is really only a mindset, no matter how deeply ingrained, can give us hope, because a mindset can be changed.
We can still take the high ground rather than succumb to the low.
We can transcend our biological heritage. We can locate a power beyond our ego. We are not what we think we are when ego is our only identity. Egolessness is in us and when we find it we embark on the path to true self-esteem and generous love for others and ourselves. There is no separate self, but there is this life of ours, this presence that is ourselves, individual and connected to all beings. Courageous people have come along in history to show us how to be generous and powerful but without ego attitude: They were all moved by a vision of an alternative to our primitive default style of aggression.
They saw that change from egocentered to others-centered living was possible, and they lived that way. They saw that the genetic propensity toward egocentricity only seems fixed. Our wisdom endowment, from our ancestor-teachers—and from among our own acquaintances—is ever-expanding as new visionaries and helpers keep appearing. It will be up to us to evolve into beings who look like Buddha in loving-kindness, like Christ in willing sacrifice, like Mother Teresa in compassionate caring, like our Aunt Lucy in selfless generosity.
In this book our style will not be judgmental but developmental.
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We will explore how our egotism came to be and how it can be worked with so it can be transformed and take its rightful place as a healthy part of our life experience. This means being willing to become intimate with our egotistical style in all its recondite and embarrassing details. When we do that we will be able to find what is best in it and put it to use to build courage and intimacy rather than to diminish them. In my own life, I came to realize that a sincere spiritual path necessarily includes letting go of ego-centeredness. Spirituality calls for a continual surrender of ego rather than looking for ways to endorse, fortify, or reinforce it.
But we can discover the joy of being set free from its grasp. I knew I had become more spiritually conscious when I started welcoming comments that pointed out how my ego was rearing its ugly head—when I finally stopped defending my ego and wanted to know how to see and tame it. Then it became more of a tool. And indeed, a proud ego-mindset does come in handy at times. Several years ago, I went with a friend to see the film Seven Years in Tibet.
We can learn just when to show it and when to leave it behind. The Irish golf pro Rory McIlroy stated it well: Once I leave the golf course. All we have to keep in mind is that it works on the field but not so well in the bedroom, living room, or anywhere you want to make room for love.
There is another important reference to ego in the film Seven Years in Tibet.
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This one balances the realization my friend had. In a marketplace, the Brad Pitt character, Heinrich Harrer, who had been an Olympic champion, finds an old newspaper with a picture of him receiving a sports award. He proudly shows it to Pema, a Tibetan woman friend. She responds by pointing out that in the West accomplishment and victory matter while in the East it is letting go of ego that matters—this is our greatest spiritual accomplishment and a gold prize indeed. The style of this book is to combine respect for ego as a useful but seldom-needed tool and compassion for the ego that fears what it most wants and thus goes so far astray from the love it seeks.
We work gently with this scared part of ourselves and others.
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We do not abandon our ego; we rehabilitate it. I am especially impressed by the idea that our values can emerge without any reference to any specific religion or God, that we all have a "natural capacity for love, integrity, and compassion" that we can nurture and increase. Feb 23, Jmp rated it really liked it.
Short chapters summarized at end with Powerful Affirmations. If I could do all this it would be wonderful and so I add Phillip Moffitt's phrase "as best I am able". Aug 21, Janet rated it really liked it Shelves: Jul 25, Sharon rated it it was amazing. Deep read with amazing affirmations! Aug 14, Julie rated it it was amazing. As always, David Richo helps me understand life and how to live it as best I can. Short chapters, perfect for starting one's day in contemplation and meditation. Tessa rated it it was amazing Apr 13, Brad rated it it was amazing Apr 10, Donna rated it really liked it Feb 22, Brobob rated it really liked it Oct 07, Flo rated it really liked it Oct 29, Peggy rated it really liked it Jul 05, Cathleen Kaufman rated it it was amazing Feb 02, Karen Knoke rated it really liked it Nov 24, Lonnie rated it really liked it Apr 25, Jenn rated it it was amazing Jul 06, Sue Mahran rated it it was amazing Apr 27, Joshua Sweetwood rated it it was amazing Apr 10, Megan Hulatt whyte rated it really liked it May 27,