1. Always act as if you are in total control.

Let's say you get a piece of bad news: What are the possible paths you can take from here? Is there a wrong way to react? What's the right way? Get advice from wise people. It's not weak to admit you could use some advice. Other people's opinions can be valuable when you're faced with a situation that you haven't encountered before. Ask people you trust what they would do in your position.

Remember, though, that only you can ultimately determine the best course.

The Science of Developing Mental Toughness in Your Health, Work, and Life

Other people's opinions are secondary to your own values. Trusted friends and family members are good people to confide in when you have a big decision to make. Take their advice with a grain of salt, though, since people who know you, even if they love you very much, might have their own personal stake in the decision you make. For example, your mom would prefer you didn't move to a different town, her advice about what college you should choose might be loaded with her emotions.

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Going to a therapist or counselor is a great idea when you feel a professional opinion could be useful. Let your conscience be your guide. That little inner voice telling you what choice to make will become louder and stronger as you gain experience and wisdom. After examining a situation from all angles and getting a few outside opinions, it's time to act on your values. Being tough means acting with honor and courage, no matter how scary it might be to do so. Don't back down unless you should. Once you've made your decision, follow through with it and stay true to your values.

The tough decision to make is often the least popular, so there will be times when it seems like other people are against you. Stay strong when others try to tear you down for doing what you believe is right. There are exceptions to this rule - like when the action you took was actually wrong.

Don't automatically get defensive if you're accused of being in the wrong. Think clearly about what happened and decide if you're still on board with your original actions. If you realize that it would have been better to do something different, admit it. Keep yourself in good physical condition. Being physically strong and healthy is beneficial for your mind as well. If you're always tired and under the weather, it's going to be a lot more difficult to deal with issues that arise. Don't neglect your body's health if your goal is to be tough.

Get plenty of sleep. This will keep your body healthy and help you stay mentally alert.

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Aim for hours per night. Make it a priority! Making these a mainstay of your diet will provide the vitamins and nutrients your mind needs to stay strong. Cardio and strength training will keep your body and brain in good shape.

If your world is cluttered up with a million things to do, it'll affect your power to make good decisions. Form strong bonds with other people. There is strength in numbers. It's easier to build a wall around yourself than to reach out and form deep relationships with other people. Earning and keeping people's trust is no simple feat. It might sound strange, but exhibiting vulnerability with others is actually an important part of being tough.

Show your family, friends and colleagues, that you're trustworthy and dependable. Answer emails and calls promptly and be there for people when you're needed. Take on a leadership role in your community. You could volunteer your time to help others, coach a little league team, start a neighborhood garden, and so on.


  • .
  • Ceaseless (Existence #3).
  • The Dominion of the World: The Transatlantic Threat (French Science Fiction Book 74).
  • 15 Habits of Mentally Tough People - TalentSmart.
  • Boopers Tale!
  • Time Just Drifts Away;

Have a stake in your community! Enrich your spiritual life. Having an active spiritual life will help give you the perspective you need when your problems threaten to consume you. Find ways to become more spiritually aware and connected to the rest of the world. Doing yoga, meditating, participating in a place of worship, and spending time in nature are all good ways to enrich yourself spiritually. Stay true to your values. Ultimately, being tough comes down to knowing your values and acting on them.

The Science of Developing Mental Toughness in Health, Work, and Life

Understanding this will help you deflect petty insults and avoid getting wrapped up in drama. It will help you figure out what's important to you and set out to achieve your goals. Most importantly, it will help you boldly make the choice to do what you know is right. Don't let the people who are staring you down affect you. Just stare back with a straight face, then look away. Don't feel intimidated, or show any emotion. Not Helpful 0 Helpful How do I get people to understand that I am tough if I have a youthful face? Show them that you don't have to look tough to be tough. You can look really young but have a rock-hard personality!

Show people that you probably shouldn't be messed with, even with your youthful face. Not Helpful 5 Helpful Show less sympathy; this sounds bad but can be efficient if you want to be more successful and competent as a boss.

2. Put aside things you have no ability to impact.

Sometimes you don't want to be strict, though, because it may be counterproductive -- there has to be a balance. It just helps you protect yourself and the people you care about. You'll never be "the best in the world" as that's not something anyone can achieve. Not Helpful 3 Helpful 7. Only jerks are tough. It's cool to be kind and nice! So you could respond with, "That's very kind of you to say. Not Helpful 38 Helpful Eye contact is big—this is how you can be intimidating without necessarily threatening. Not Helpful 0 Helpful 0. What can I do to deal with people who are stronger than me?

Answer this question Flag as How can I concentrate harder on my goals? Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Already answered Not a question Bad question Other. Tips Talk in a medium-loud voice. No one will listen if you're too quiet, and no one will pay attention if you're too loud.

Look people in the eye when you talk to them. Don't allow your 'tough attitude' to turn into anything too aggressive, keep control. You don't want to send the image to others that you are crazy, so avoid making strange faces or yelling a lot. Warnings Threatening people makes it worse, and will land you in a heap of trouble. There is a significant difference between confident and cocky. Whatever it is, you care, and you want others to care. Do what you can do: Lend a listening ear. Recycle, and reduce your carbon footprint. Do what you can do. Be your own change--but don't try to make everyone else change.

Easier said than done?

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It depends on your perspective. When something bad happens to you, see it as an opportunity to learn something you didn't know. When another person makes a mistake, don't just learn from it--see it as an opportunity to be kind, forgiving, and understanding. The past is just training; it doesn't define you. Think about what went wrong but only in terms of how you will make sure that next time, you and the people around you will know how to make sure it goes right.

Many people--I guarantee you know at least a few--see success as a zero-sum game: There's only so much to go around. When someone else shines, they think that diminishes the light from their stars. When a friend does something awesome, that doesn't preclude you from doing something awesome. In fact, where success is concerned, birds of a feather tend to flock together--so draw your successful friends even closer.

Create and celebrate awesomeness, wherever you find it, and in time you'll find even more of it in yourself.


  • The Seekers: Murder In The Boneyard.
  • Up a Rutted Road.
  • One of Us;
  • How to Be Tough: 15 Steps (with Pictures) - wikiHow.

Your words have power, especially over you. Whining about your problems always makes you feel worse, not better. So if something is wrong, don't waste time complaining. Put that mental energy into making the situation better. Unless you want to whine about it forever, eventually you'll have to make it better. So why waste time? Don't talk about what's wrong. Talk about how you'll make things better, even if that conversation is only with yourself. And do the same with your friends or colleagues. Don't just serve as a shoulder they can cry on. Friends don't let friends whine; friends help friends make their lives better.

No one likes you for your clothes, your car, your possessions, your title, or your accomplishments. Those are all things. People may like your things--but that doesn't mean they like you.