See, I knew Abby. I know her best from improv circles, and then directing her in a show that briefly merits a mention halfway through the book the one where she plays the bearded lady. At the time, I found her talented and extremely interesting, and really was happy that she was in the play. It was much better for her having been in it.
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I had no idea that she was afflicted with OCD. And now, fifteen years later, I discover this whole massive book all about who she was And the funny thing is I think I always wanted to know. I am a nosy bastard by inclination, and since I think this is basically a weakness, I try hard to respect the walls of privacy people put up around themselves. This is like some kind of crazy gift that I can't imagine how it ever got to me. This is a good book even if you didn't ever direct Abby Sher in a show where she plays a bearded lady. But that improves it. Feb 23, Paul rated it really liked it.
I somewhat liked reading this book because I have OCD, and this book made me feel like a neurotypical. I would hate to have the obsessions and compulsions of the author. I've never heard of anyone with such horrible obsessions and compulsions. I feel bad that she kills everyone she sees, has to pray all day, has a completely undifferentiated relationship with her moth I somewhat liked reading this book because I have OCD, and this book made me feel like a neurotypical.
I feel bad that she kills everyone she sees, has to pray all day, has a completely undifferentiated relationship with her mother, and tries to emulate or copy the personalities of those of whom she is fond. I would have thought she also has schizo-affective disorder too, based on some of her hallucinations, but I'm not a psychiatrist, and I've never played one on TV.
By the last 40 pages of the book, I was asking myself, "Does this ever end? Does she ever get better? She writes at the end that she felt the closest to normal when she got pregnant.
That poor baby has got quite a genetic load to overcome; I hope she turns out O. As my adopted daughter said to me when she was in high school, "This was a great family to grow up in, but I'm sure glad I'm not genetically related to any of you. Sher's an excellent writer with an admirable vocabulary. The only mistake I found was that she used the word nauseous causing nausea when she meant nauseated experiencing nausea.
If you can get through this book without screaming or running around with a bag over your head claiming you are Jesus, you'll do well. Apr 21, nicole rated it really liked it Shelves: My brother has OCD and I don't understand it. I mean, I understand it the way someone who was a psychology minor in undergrad understands it, but to see someone you love so much suffering so greatly makes it harder to find any comfort in that clinical understanding. I want so badly to know the right thing to say, to have the answers for him, or at least for myself.
My brother's ability to describe the nuances of his own struggle are brave and incredible, but I still feel like at such a loss. So I sought comfort in my own compulsive reading.
- Muhammad Ali and the Decline of Sportsmanship;
- I changed my life: 20 Stories of Women from the World of Tupperware (Italian Edition)?
- Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn't Stop Praying (Among Other Things).
- Die Gebote des Ordens (German Edition).
- Shaping Your Legs and Glutes With Bells & Bars Mini eBook?
- Queens Wild;
- A Day with Robert Schumann [Illustrated];
Spending time with Shear's story was both helpful and hurtful, seeing things that mirror his life and things that don't. They both developed these behaviors after an unexpected loss, although there were signs before that. They are both incredibly creative individuals who want so badly to protect others. There are things they cannot say, cannot do, because of the way they believe the world works.
But her path led her to physical self-abuse, where my brother is in a constant battle with his mind. She chose cognitive behavioral therapy and he has not. I appreciated the candor with which she told her story, even when it wasn't easy. I felt frustration with her at times, but mostly because I recognized the situation in which she was in, or put others in, and that opened the gate for feelings I have about my own family situation to present themselves.
This was a read that I needed. Jun 11, Erin Shea Smith rated it really liked it. Gracefully written, heartfelt, lovely. It did feel a bit rushed at the end, and I think I maybe unfairly expected as much detail at the latter half as I did the first. There were some major developments that felt rushed, hurried. Significant, though, is that she doesn't attempt to make this very complex disease simple or easily digestible for the reader. It's raw and poignant and worth the read. In some ways it was, in others — not so much. Abby has had much too much loss in her life, beginning when she was most vulnerable, as a child.
Her OCD Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder began manifesting itself before the losses but was greatly exacerbated when someone close to her died. She began to feel she was responsible for countless deaths and she had to find ways to ward off the deaths she was causing. Lots of rituals, hours of compulsive prayer, and ridding the world of anything dangerous. That last part meant picking up trash, stray paperclips that could puncture a tire causing a blowout and death for an entire family, pieces of glass, sharp metal, even leaves with sharp, pointy stems.
Her religion seemed more of a superstition than faith. I know that repetition is a huge part of OCD, but the reader shouldn't have to suffer the same fate. A good part of the first half of the book involved countless recollections of imaginary deaths and molestations she caused. Abby even quit a job working with children because she convinced herself she was molesting them. She would circle a block numerous times, looking for the person she thought she mowed down on the previous lap.
Very sad, but the repetition got old. The second half of the book was more interesting, but also frustrating to me in some ways. Memoirs are supposed to be about the person writing the book, all fair and good. But Abby was so involved with her illness that she seemed to have very little insight into the people around her. I didn't find the empathy I expected.
That doesn't mean that Abby doesn't feel it, but it didn't come across in the book. In my opinion, the book has some flaws, but I did find it interesting. Abby has worked hardto overcome her OCD and I wish her the very best. Through the Goodreads First Reads program, she provided a copy of this book to me and I thank her. Dec 04, Diane rated it really liked it.
Abby Sher was a happy child from a musical family until about the age of ten. When her father and favorite aunt pass away, Abby deals with her grief and the loss by performing various rituals. For example, kissing her fathers picture over and over again at night. Suddenly something so seemingly harmless grows into a series of elaborate rituals such as: Before long her prayer r Abby Sher was a happy child from a musical family until about the age of ten.
Before long her prayer ritual alone grows into her spending hours reciting prayers and pleas, for she firmly believed that if she stopped other people would surely die too. It is not until college, feeling out of control, suffering from anorexia and self-mutilation issues as well that Abby is finally diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn't Stop Praying (Among Other Things)
I was surprised that the story was even funny in parts, and it did not leave me feeling depressed. Dec 01, Cassidy rated it it was amazing Shelves: It's easy to write reviews about mediocre books, good books, decent books, nice books, pretty books, okay books, bad books, and horrible books. But it's very difficult to write a review about a brilliant book. I don't know how to write this review. The only way I can think of to describe the brilliance found in this memoir is to say I can't describe the brilliance found in this memoir. Instead of typing up hund It's easy to write reviews about mediocre books, good books, decent books, nice books, pretty books, okay books, bad books, and horrible books.
Instead of typing up hundred pages trying and undoubtedly failing to describe the brilliance of 'Amen, Amen, Amen: May 31, Edessa Grace Uy rated it it was amazing. Picked up this book immediately after reading Prozac Nation and I'm glad I did. What a great read! Honest and refreshing, this gave a clear view of how people with OCD go through life on a daily basis. Unlike most memoirs recounting a life of mental illness, Sher did it in a light and humurous way.
Amen, Amen, Amen is very deep and personal but is insightful, inspiring, beautifully written. It doesn't overwhelm, it does not alienate "outsiders"; it doesn't pull you in a hole of darkness. Simply put, this is a tale about a girl who used praying as a weapon to face her different battles in life, and coming out the winner. Jan 25, Kristin Louise Duncombe rated it it was amazing. Fantastic writing, compelling story, absolutely the best description of OCD I have ever read. Aug 23, Lorraine rated it liked it Shelves: This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers.
To view it, click here. The book glorifies self harm and paints the tendency to self harm as an ego maniacal form of attention seeking. Anyone who has REAL self harm troubles or is in recovery I hesitate to write a review because I don't want to criticize, especially someone who has faced mental and emotional challenges. I guess, on a positive note, I can say that the book was an interesting account of someone with multiple mental health issues- namely OCD, anorexia, and self harm. What I loved about the book - Abby Sher's Mom. I loved her Mom and Dad both, but especially her Mom. I mean, I loved, loved, loved her Mom.
She was dignified, poised, caring, kind, and smart. What a great character. She stuck with Abby through thick and thin. Her stoicism and courage reminded me of my own mother, in ways. What I did not like about the book Every single noun had multiple adjectives, the adjectives all had adverbs, ALL verbs were activated, every word or phrase was adorned in multiple spasms of overindulgent, navel-gazing verbiage. Not everything in life needs to be told in detail. If you are admitted to a hospital, for instance, no one needs to know your sock and underwear choice, or how the socks felt as you languidly slipped them on and padded, listlessly, distractedly down the airy, mint green hallway I found the reflections melodramatic and horribly self absorbed.
It was very disturbing to read, actually. The author seemed unable to realize that other people were living and being- absolutely independent of her. Her mother was a dignified woman. Does it mean anything to anyone that her mother's ability to speak was impaired? Did the author have to paint a verbal picture of her Mom in that state? The book was not deeper or more meaningful because of those details. Why rob her Mom of her dignity when she had been such a dignified woman?
That really upset me. Where is the loyalty? Final take away- Abby gets help through yoga. Well, good for that. It was nice to read that yoga helped her. I give this book three stars just because I liked the Mom so much. If I judged based on the main character, I would give one star. This memoir was an emotional ride.
It was inherently sad and poignant, and very compelling. Abby Sher tells of her life and her spiral into OCD and eventually anorexia. The love she has for her family and close friends is deep, and her failed relationships engulf the reader in her sadness. I listened to this as an audiobook. Yes, the book is sad. But not in a despair sense. There was a deep melancholy to it. But it was always compelling.
Oct 12, Grace S. I'm not sure I've had a weirder book-reviewing experience than trying to review something that's essentially someone frankly revealing a painful life journey.
Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn’t Stop Praying (Among Other Things) by Abby Sher
Hopefully I do okay. At some point during the reading of Amen, Amen, Amen, I realized that it was sort of a frankenbook--started out one thing, turned into another. We begin in a very simplified, childish prose purposely so, I'm not trying to insult I'm not sure I've had a weirder book-reviewing experience than trying to review something that's essentially someone frankly revealing a painful life journey. We begin in a very simplified, childish prose purposely so, I'm not trying to insult. Sher's narrative voice describes her life, including the OCD, in a way completely free of clinical analysis or medical information.
Important distinction, and I felt it was a good choice. It made things much more emotionally compelling, occasionally terribly difficult for me to read. The compulsive behaviors are the things you've seen in pop-culture OCD for a long time--hand-washing, touching or picking things up, and such. Where the description of Abby's childhood with OCD gets a touch too real for comfort is in her descriptions of the obsessive thoughts influencing her behavior. The idea that she is responsible for the deaths and pain of loved ones, the devotion to mother, father, and God in the place of romance or pursuing her own desires, the ghastly visions of blood and destruction.
When narrated simply, frankly, and free of analysis, it really all paints a haunting picture, especially when it's been specifically tailored to sound like a child is narrating. But then somewhere around college things changed. As the prose gradually became more world-wise and grown up, and as Abby begins living life on her own terms rather than under her mother's roof, that is , it becomes a memoir that's really not so much about OCD anymore.
Compulsive exercising and eating disorders seem to go hand-in-hand with OCD to me.
Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn't Stop Praying (Among Other Things)
In order to avoid obsessive consequence: But as the OCD-centric first half of the book faded away we encounter view spoiler [a love life, children rallying around a dying mother, an abortion, self-mutilation, hide spoiler ] and other such adult hardships that make this more of a typical dysfunctional adulthood memoir. Suddenly this focal point of the book, the defining characteristic of Sher's life selected to stand for her in the title of the work, gets a few throwaway sentences every once in a while and little else.
I was also a little concerned with elements of the ending, mainly the implication that view spoiler [getting pregnant and having a baby constituted some amazing emotional turnaround. That part's quite realistic and satisfying, and I would much rather than than tying things up with a bow and implying everything's AOK now. I have a baby girl. In certain regards she has made me reevaluate who I am as a person, try to be better, and brings smiles and new wonders to my life.
Amen, Amen, Amen: Memoir of a Girl Who Couldn't Stop Praying by Abby Sher
BUT it's not all lollipops and rainbows either, and I sort of felt like Sher was saying that having her daughter was a purely positive experience. I also spend significant amounts of time worrying about what I might have passed on to her from anxiety to nearsightedness to bad knees, but mostly the anxiety. I also have days where the demanding and radically different life path of having a baby see: On the whole, though, one of the better nonfiction pieces I've read in recent memory.
Some of those "other things" in the title aren't what you'd think. Read Harder Reading Challenge Item: Read a book in which the main character has a mental illness This book was incredibly well-written and at times very hard to read. It begins with what the author seems to see as the "triggering" event for her lifelong struggle with OCD, which was the death of her favorite aunt, followed closely by the death of her father.
At age 11, she is not fully able to process his loss, and because of that, she never cries and assumes this must mean that she wanted him to d Read Harder Reading Challenge Item: At age 11, she is not fully able to process his loss, and because of that, she never cries and assumes this must mean that she wanted him to die or that his death was somehow her fault.
From there, she develops elaborate rituals, mostly related to praying, that she hopes will both "make up for" the part she feels she played in his death, and protect her other loved ones against a similar fate. Although Abby is Jewish, her ritualistic prayer was incredibly familiar to this Catholic girl, who has been known to resort to obsessively praying the rosary in my own times of greatest doubt and fear. Despite her compulsory piety, her relationship with God never seems to evolve past the "bartering" stage, wherein she believes that if she does everything a certain way, God will reward her with safety for her loved ones.
She suffers an inordinate amount of guilt for normal developmental milestones, such as her first crushes or her need to differentiate from her parents. And although she does seem to get something out of her piety, it made me sad that she didn't seem able to attain a higher level of spirituality, although there were hints of that near the end. This book's strongest section is probably when Abby is first giving in to her OCD, before she understands that it is an illness and when she fully believes her delusions about the level of control she has over events and the horrible things that she has done.
The way this is written really traps the reader in that mindset, making her feel as suffocated as Abby must have. It's heartbreaking to see an adolescent girl bearing the weight of her entire world on her shoulders, and this memoir seems to be an examination of how completely a child's psyche can spin out of control when she is confronted with trauma beyond her ability to understand or absorb.
Although Abby probably would have developed OCD in some form regardless, I do wonder how her path would have been different had she not lost her father at such a young age. There are places around the middle to end where the story begins to bow a little under its own weight, as Abby adds self-harm and anorexia to her list of mental ailments. It ca n be frustrating to watch the way she lets her life spin out of control and the way she pushes away the man who loves her.
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It felt a bit reductionist, like that whole idea that a woman is not fully a woman until she gives birth; also, I don't think it's wise to ever consider having a baby to be a cure for any problem except that of wanting a baby -- it felt like a cop-out not to extend the book out to how Abby adjusted to the trials of motherhood, which can threaten even the healthiest of psyches. In college, Abby is diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, and while it helps explain the counting and kissing and collecting, she resists rationalizing her deepest obsession, certain that her prayers are not an illness but the cure.
Unable to confront the fears that drive her, she descends into darker compulsions, cutting and starving herself, measuring every calorie and each incision. But even in the darkest moments of her illness, there are glimmers of laughter and hope, for she carries the irrepressible spirit and passion that are so much a part of her family. Ultimately, it is another loss-the death of her mother-that compels Abby to redefine the terms of her illness and her faith, freeing her to live and love more fully.
Full of heartbreak, buoyant with humor, and marked by exceptionally vivid storytelling, Amen, Amen, Amen is a brilliant account of soul-searching, self-discovery, and the bounds and boundlessness of obsession and devotion. How to write a great review. The review must be at least 50 characters long. The title should be at least 4 characters long. Your display name should be at least 2 characters long. At Kobo, we try to ensure that published reviews do not contain rude or profane language, spoilers, or any of our reviewer's personal information.
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